Donuts - The Blog

Eraser Cake

2009-07-15T04:27:00.000-07:00

SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!!!

What can I say. A hell of a lot has happened over the last few weeks. Check out Lari's blog for some great pix and stories.

On a serious note, my confidence in the youth of Britain has been restored. Whilst cycling home the other day I noticed a sign for "FAR CLOSE" - Someone had scrawled in a "T" with black marker. I think you can work out where the T was. Love it.

Speaking of cycling, anyone have bad knees? They are a real pain. At work we've got a company-wide "Livewell" challenge that's designed to encourage people to get out and exercise more. Miles are counted so I have been pumping up the jam on my cycling. Thanks to the new and improved regimen my frigging right knee sounds like someone running a piece of rubber across a cheese grater every time I bend it, especially when walking on stairs. Keep in mind I've had two surgeries on my left knee. Guess I should be thankful it hasn't started acting up.

What has been going on? Hmm. It was my niece's birthday yesterday. A year old already. Happy Birthday, ABBY!!!!! Guess Hilary has another one in the oven. Hope Conrad gets along with the father. Zoe turned 5 on June 23rd. She's damn proud of it. Audrey is becoming very good at swimming. She "graduates" to the next level tonight. Zoe has done really well, too. She has gained a lot more confidence, depending on whether I've tied the concrete blocks around her ankles or not. You gotta see her leg muscles now! They sure are growing up, though. I am so proud of those kids and try to tell them so regularly. It's hard not to when you see them in action. Audrey still reads like a fiend and loves her animals, bicycle, music, writing, drawing, hanging out with her friends, and of course her Nintendo DS. Zoe also still loves her books (most nights we have to clear off a few dozen books so she doesn't suffocate), doing crafty stuff, playing with her friends, dressing up, tying ribbons on every object in the house, and of course, her newly acquired Nintendo DS.

We're still loving the UK and seem to have transitioned from a travel-every-weekend phase to a do-what-the-Brits-do phase, hence our regular attendance at pubs, a steam rally, air show, folk festival, British Motocross Championship, the pubs, school plays, swimming lessons, the pubs, etc. I should know a little more in a week or so about what our U.S. return plans look like. I'm hearing rumor that it might be end of the year, but there's a lot of factors involved so I'm not cashing any checks just yet. Knowing that it may be the end of the year has put us in a different mental state, which certainly explains the new phase of how we are experiencing the UK.

The Master Planner, my lovely wife, is working on an itinerary for a driving trip to Belgium, Luxembourg, France, Germany and Austria next month. Apart from the amazing scenery and historic towns, we're going to try and make a quick stop by the KTM factory in Austria. I just found out yesterday that they are shut down whilst we are there, so no factory tour, but I'm going anyway. Maybe the gift shop will be open. I'll have something nice waiting for everyone.

The girls have 3 days of school left before Summer break. (Yep, the school year is just now ending here!) Good luck with the girls, honey. (I say as I am peeling out of the driveway.)

YOU SUCK

2009-07-02T23:17:00.000-07:00

Follows, since you read a blog that never gets updated.

I SUCK

2009-07-02T23:16:00.001-07:00

Just stating the obvious.

Thick, defined

2009-05-19T06:02:00.000-07:00

Jawohl

2009-05-11T12:29:00.000-07:00

One of the great things about being here in Europe is the occasional situation you get into that you'd never have gotten into back home in the States.

Take work last Friday: Paul and I were both sitting at our desks when we took notice of an odd gesture by one of the other folks. Now, Paul and I don't sit very close to each other, but we both can see this particular person. I happened to casually glance up, only to see this person raise their right arm to about a 45 degree angle, straighten it, and leave it there for a good full 10 seconds. Being ever so politically correct, my mind starting revving up with all the comments I could make after seeing such a thing. No sooner did I think this, when Paul said "Jawohl..." (pronounced "Ya Vohl" for those without the benefit of some WWII German lessons.) Thank goodness this person had a sense of humor about it as this initial comment quickly devolved into various escapades, including one of the German guys tucking his trousers into his black boots and goose stepping around the office. Oh yeah, complete with a moustache fashioned from a post-it. These are the precious moments.

For the record, the arm thing was an attempt at trying to visually represent a graph of a line growing linearly. I'd use a white board next time...

I'll keep bugging Lari about her blog updates. We have a lot to share but just haven't gotten around to it. She has taken some amazing photos with her new gear, her good eye and her talent, so stay tuned.

That's it for now. I'll close with a chapter from the mountain biking book. As you can see, casualties happen on some of our rides. As Lari often says, "Poor Marco..."

Yeah, baby!!!!

2009-04-29T05:18:00.000-07:00

My shy baby entered a speech competition a few weeks ago. Well, today was the big performance day. She gave her memorized speech in front of around 80 people. It was a judged competition and she was up against 34 other entrants. She nailed it, British accent all! Turns out her proud parents weren't the only ones who thought she nailed it, she got first prize!!!
WAY TO GO, AUDREY!!!!!! You can stay with us a few more years!!!
We are so proud of this kid we could burst.

P.S. This was not just the Best of Brixworth Primary School competing, it was all of Northampton and surrounding villages!

Hot Dogs

2009-04-23T05:44:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to Akee Boy (Yesterday) and Jenn (today)!

Two wheels in the blood

2009-04-21T04:07:00.000-07:00

To put a sock in her nagging, I got Zoe a bike this weekend. Let's recap: We were in the shop Friday night picking up a part and Zoe wandered over to the kids bikes. We pulled one out and she scooted around on it a bit. We were in a rush to leave so I told her we "might" come back the next day, but it depended on whether we went to London. She responded with: "Not *might* Dad, we *will* come back tomorrow." That settled that. We did go back the next day and picked up Zoe's first bike and upgraded Auds to the next size up. Audrey's new ride fits her much better and she looks fantastic on it! Both of these kids are naturals. Zoe burned rubber out of the shop and on our 2 hour ride at Pitsford Reservoir. I'll be taking the training wheels off possibly even on her next outing. She is aggressive, possibly even moreso than her sister. Our goal on the ride was to reach a point on the reservoir trail where there's a couple of small hills. By small, I mean 4 feet tall-ish. While Zoe and I watched, Audrey made a few passes, psyched herself out on one particular steep-ish downhill, then as we were leaving, preceded to attempt going up the steep one - twice. Although she didn;t quite make it, I give her a lot of credit for going for it! She'll be ready for Cannock Chase and getting her bike stolen from there in no time.

Side note: Our waitress this weekend was a gymnast and she just made the England national squad! We got her autograph. Cool.

Check out my awesome kids!

Sometimes you just nail it

2009-04-15T15:13:00.000-07:00

I'm not one to brag, but this is a sweet self-portrait. Sorry for the shit updates.
We've been super busy. A couple weeks ago we had a marathon weekend, and now Lari's sister, Kari, is out here so we're balls out again. Updates soon... Be good.

Lucky in Love

2009-03-24T14:07:00.000-07:00

Lari's age is larger than her cup size

2009-03-24T13:24:00.000-07:00

The post is late, but the celebrations were not. Lari's birthday was on the 19th. Let's just say that she's older than her kids and younger than her parents.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BABES!!!!

Lari went for a surprise Spa weekend at Whittlebury Hall. This after a rousing evening at The George. See below for Audrey's take on the evening. (All pictures taken by Auds! Pretty nice job!)

One for the Flock of Seagulls series

Inside The George

A window in The George shortly before I broke it

Glad I could dress up for the occasion. (Go Saints!)

Some deco in The George

Zilbs in The George

The good side of a deviated septum

The look is pure Collins

Two nice pints of Cumberland Ale

The classy lady herself

I can't get over how big my baby is...

Birthday girl and her Waitrose cake. Only the best for my girl.

Visitors

2009-03-16T08:59:00.000-07:00

Firstly about our Colorado trip: It was awesome. Period. Thanks to everyone who showed up at Old Chicago's and made time for us (and meals) in the following days. I usually don't have a problem with jet lag but the girls sure did, and that translated into a rough time for Lari and I. Once the girls would rattle around and scream at each other about having too much blanket, usually at 3:30 A.M. or so, I was done. Oh well, I got to try out the Precor 846i exercise bike (way cool, since it's recumbent) and spend a lot of hours on the phone to the Europe team talking work. I have to give a shout out to the Embassy Suites hotel. It's absolutely PERFECT for families. Free breakfast, made to order. Lots of space what with two main rooms. We could have used a more powerful fan in the bathroom, but that's my only real complaint. And it was cheap, especially compared to UK prices.

The week and a half was spent doing some work mixed in with a whole lot of shopping and catching up with friends. We stopped by our house which looks amazingly good for having 7 people in it. We hit Palmer Park. We ate some home-cooked meals. We even had some tense family moments. No stone was unturned.

BTW, I picked up a DS whilst there. The final straw was learning that they have MX vs. ATV Untamed for it. Hell yeah. Yes, I'm too old for that kind of thing but at least I have another thing to relate to the kids with.

A lot of people asked us what we felt about coming home to Colorado and how we felt about England when returning. I think Lari said it best: England and Colorado are analagous to having two kids who are very different. You love them both just the same despite the differences.

Adrian and Andrea came out for a bit over a week and by all accounts had a great time. Except when we had to be with them. The girls were SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO wound up with them here. Mental note: The girls need more attention.

I'll let Adrian tell his saucy tales via his blog. Thanks for coming out here guys - we had a blast!

On a last note, England finally whupped some ass in the Six Nations Rugby. Granted, France was playing like garbage but we'll take it.

Honey, we're home!

2009-02-16T09:30:00.001-08:00

We're headed back for a short visit to Colorado. Two things strike me as we are getting ready for the trip:

1) I am going to miss the hell out of this place when we leave.
2) There is some truth to the bad weather reputation England has.

Got snow shovel?

2009-02-05T04:30:00.000-08:00

This is the view from our window this morning

The Cask of Amontillado

2009-01-25T08:08:00.001-08:00

More pix from the vault. Enjoy.

Someone is thinking about whether or not he/she remembered
to add that air filter to his/her Rocky Mountain order

Auds looking cute as usual. She was beat just after this for leaving her blanket on the floor.

Zilbs at G&G's house in Reno for Hilary's wedding. Uh, did I not just ask for a beer?

Lari's feelings on the price of fondue

Is it me or is Zoe orange?

No caption needed

We had a special visitor at Adrian's house

It's not just me. She is orange.

Audrey smacking the hell out of Zoe

Our good friend Liz. That's all you need to know.

Phil, thank you for inspiring a lifetime of goodbye wave style

Surfactant

2009-01-19T12:03:00.000-08:00

Went to a race called "The Tough One" this weekend held in a Welsh rock quarry. Think of it as the bike world equivalent to a weekend with the in-laws It's tolerable for about 8 nanoseconds then you want to go home.

The start of the race, an awkward amble up the hill on foot. The guy who ended up winning the race (Taddy Blazusiak) got center-punched by the pre-race favorite (David Knight) at the start. Of note, Knight was on his bike at the time, Taddy was not.

One of the hills. It's steeper and slimier than it looks

This ever so slightly reminded me of a desert-y section. I, of course,
thought of Adrian and his one true love. Andrea.

In other moto news, check out Kyle Summers:

http://www.racerxonline.com/article/worcs-round-1-race-report.aspx

He should have stuck with KTM, obviously, but that aside, this Colorado Springs kid is doing awesome!!

We've officially been in England over a year now. Wow does time fly. There's a chance that my contract will be extended as I've taken on some additional responsibilities over here. We're actually glad for that - there's so much more we want to see and do.

But, no, my blog won't get any better.

More later.

That's a real surprise, Clark.

2008-12-19T09:44:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas, everyone! We snagged a tree a couple weeks ago - popped for a live one, which was a nice change of pace from our collapsible wonder back at home. The girls have been going berserk in anticipation of the big day. Lari and I have had to restrain each other at one point or another from beating the kids. Calm down, folks, we have insurance, they're covered.

I just got back from Munich. Although a work trip, I was able to break free and walk through a couple of the famous Christmas Markets down town. I would have never seen Lari again if she had accompanied me - she loves these things. One of the Markets has a medieval theme to it. The high point of it was the food. It served as a reminder of how bad British food is.

The other high point was seeing a stand that sold those wooden spinny decoration things that Randy Quaid jacks up in Christmas Vacation. I was tempted to get one but they were super fragile and I would have pulled a Quaid on it during transport back home. Sorry, Adrian.

Have a great Christmas and New Year!

Lucky Man

2008-12-12T04:12:00.000-08:00

Look at these beautiful girls!!!! I am in trouble in a few years...

Endoplasmic Reticulum

2008-12-01T14:04:00.000-08:00

Got foam beard?

Haps

2008-11-24T12:21:00.000-08:00

Let's see, what's up?

Zoe is starting to read! She has made incredible progress in the last month or so.

Audrey has talent to burn when it comes to music

My Dad just finished a PhD. Something about "Engineering Graduate Preparedness for the Workplace: Employer Assessments of Outcome Based Education." Whatever. Congrats, Dad!

Apparently I'm never going to post anything about our vacation. True.

It snowed this weekend!

We are going to Bath this weekend. They have an annual Christmas Market there. Looks cool.

I'm loving the latest exchange rate.

I'm not loving the DOW

#7 doesn't quite offset #8

The U.K doesn't celebrate Thanksgiving, obviously, so it's business as usual around here

Hope everyone at home has a great holiday week. Enjoy the time off!

Pat

Bonfire Night

2008-11-19T06:04:00.000-08:00

Dr. Busker's band performed at the bonfire festivities. Busker is the guy on the accordian at the upper right. I don't know what the hell the other people are doing. This was a seriously rag-tag group of people.

To put this in perspective, Lari is 7 miles from the bonfire

That's a house in the lower left of the fire

Back to driving like an a$$

2008-11-18T06:18:00.000-08:00

Driver's Test? Check. This is a serious weight off of my shoulders/mind/family. The deal is that after a year in the U.K. you have to have a full UK license or you can't drive! With the deadline looming, and the leadtime for appointments being around 9 weeks, I was in all or nothing mode.

And this...

2008-11-16T11:10:00.001-08:00

Sorry for making you look at Adrian for so long...

2008-11-16T11:06:00.001-08:00

Now look at this for a while...

Brotherly Love

2008-10-19T11:33:00.000-07:00

This is how Adrian looks when I talk about "family" things

This is exactly how he looked when he "accidentally" knocked my teeth out, years later
Sweet jam jams, eh. Thanks, Hazel!

These'll go sweet with my new YZ80!
I'll let the ASU hoody slide only because Mom worked there.

Get used to it

2008-10-14T13:12:00.001-07:00

Did I mention that I've got this blasted driving test coming up? Not looking forward to it.

Well, we've pretty much hit all the seasons in the UK between living here almost a year now (!!!) and visiting over the years. We can call early fall the "spider season" as far as I'm concerned. These babies are EVERYWHERE! We literally have to assess the situation as we leave through the front door every day because not only have they tossed webs all over the yard, my car, every corner in the house, across the windows, my kids, and occasionally my hats - while I am wearing them - etc., but they've got a particularly industrious one stationed in the light just outside the main exit. You never know where the anchor threads are tethered, and it's easy to walk right thru them if you're not careful.

And don't even bother knocking it down. The bastard will be nearly finished with the the new one before you've torn down the old one.

We call her Charlotte.

Em Ecks Day Nashuns

2008-10-14T13:05:00.001-07:00

How was the MX Des Nations, you ask? I'll let my pictures do the talking.

Narthanc

2008-10-10T10:30:00.000-07:00

Nous aimons Paris!

Looking at the Eiffel Tower is a little different than being IN the Eiffel Tower!

In front of the Louvre

Notre Dame

My man Winston

Seer Goggles and Jofa Face Masks

2008-09-26T05:40:00.000-07:00

Did anyone read my Golden Balls entry?

Didn't think so.

I'm loving McVities mini digestive biscuits here lately. To be sure - "digestive" and "biscuits" conjure up some questionable things in the American mind when both used to describe a food, but I assure you , these are just some tasty mini-cookies.

The entire househould is getting our standard beginning of school year sick bug passed around. Zoe got zapped within seconds of being back in the multi-kid snot fest.

Hope everyone is well. I am getting seriously revved up for the MX Des Nations this weekend. For those that know nothing about it, check:

http://www.vitalmx.com/news/press-release/Red-Bull-Motocross-of-Nations-on-Donniongtons-Stage-This-Weekend,3881

Have fun.

Beans

2008-09-16T04:50:00.001-07:00

Lake Windermere, starring the front 2/3 of Audrey's head

I've got some catching up to do. Sorry for the sparse updates, life has been crazy. Mind you, it'll continue to be sparse. (My life.)

I've tossed in some pictures from our holiday to the Lake District a few weeks back. We're in the middle of planning another week outing, this time to southern France. Provence, to be exact. There is SO much to see down there - a week will not do it justice, but we can always drive back again soon. We did decide to drive down there as flying/trains are just too damn expensive and a pain to deal with. Lugging car seats around, as Adrian knows, sucks.

Last Friday I took the theoretical portion of my driver's test. It wasn't too bad, though I will say that it's in a different league than the U.S. tests. In addition to the multiple choice part of the test, you have to do a "Hazard Perception" test. In this part, they play a series of 14 video clips during which you have to click when you see a hazard developing. You are scored based on how quickly you spot the hazard. What a pain in the ass. Well, it's over, now I get to worry about the driving test itself. I hear rumour that only 43% of people pass their first driving test... I guess these cats will flunk you in a heartbeat for some reasonably minor infractions. As an example, if you don't use your mirrors every micro-second they get particularly grumpy. I have some learning and some unlearning to do...

Audrey and Zoe are back in school now. Zoe is at the big school (Brixworth Primary) with her sister, and her attitude towards her days away from home has improved 100% over her days at the pre-school. We're very happy about that.

Audrey started playing the recorder. I expect she'll be giving Zamfir a run for his money soon. If he played recorder.

We saw Little Moreton House on the way up north

Our cottage, called The Steps

Beatrix Potter's house, called Hill Top

My girls are puzzle masters

Cool tavern sign, crappy tavern.

Carlisle Castle, just south of the Scotland border

Castlerigg Stone Circle

THIS is a proper pub. Hole in t'wall in Bowness

Goofin' around in the Hole in t'wall

Aira Force

A big rock. Those are the girls at the base of it.

The Great Oak at Sherwood Forest

We hit London a couple weeks ago for our anniversary. The Cabinet War rooms and Churchill Museum weren't exactly romantic, but we had a good time anyway...

We're headed to the MX Des Nations in a couple weeks. Go team USA!

Later...

Heureux anniversaire!

2008-09-03T05:56:00.000-07:00

13 years. Wow. There's an awful lot of divorces going around anymore it seems, so I'm pretty proud (mainly lucky that Lari is so awesome and puts up with me) to have made it this far and still be going strong. And to have the two best kids ever produced - life is good.

Happy Anniversary, babes. I love you!!!!

Golden Balls

2008-09-01T10:10:00.001-07:00

Our vacation a couple weeks ago to the Lake District afforded us some much needed down time. (Lari will have a few thousand pictures posted on her blog soon.) Since the Olympics were on, we ended up watching a bit of tele throughout the week. One thing led to another and we soon had a nightly ritual of watching the game show “Golden Balls” before walking in to town to eat. Aside from the fact that the title leaves you immediately tempted to make an ever so witty joke, there is actually some redeeming qualities. I gotta tell you about this game.

Basically, there are three phases. In the first, the elimination round, there are 4 players pitted against each other. They are randomly given 5 “Golden Balls” in which are hidden either a cash amount or the word “Killer.” Each contestant then looks at all of their balls, but reveals only a couple of them to everyone else (2 out of their 5, I think.) After revealing these 2, they have a few minutes to talk to each other about the content of their remaining undisclosed balls. Ultimately the group wants to get rid of the Killer balls and take through high cash amounts, so the people always try to convince each other that they have no Killer balls remaining. (You’ll see why you don’t want Killers in phase 2. Not surprisingly, somehow no one ever has the Killer balls.) At the end of the “debate” they each vote to throw someone out. These votes are tallied and someone gets kicked off. The beauty is that after the person gets kicked off – everyone has to reveal their undisclosed balls so you begin to see who is lying or not. The person who gets kicked off has to bin (i.e. remove from the game) their balls. So, if they ended up having some high cash amounts then too bad, these are out of play. Ideally, you would want to kick someone off who had low cash amounts and as many Killer balls as possible. This round repeats again to result in 2 of the four people remaining. Alliances get formed real fast, usually.

On to phase 2.

In phase two (Bin or Win) the remaining balls are collected and another Killer is added. These are mixed up then placed on a table in front of the two remaining players. The first player then picks a ball to “bin.” The chosen ball (random, of course, but they seem to think there is a science behind picking a randomly placed ball, to the extent that they will sit there and debate it for quite some time. People – the balls have been randomly placed. Asking each other “are you sure that’s the one” won’t help – even if you ask it more than once) gets removed from play. Of course, before trashing it, the host will reveal what is contained in the ball. If it contains a large cash amount, then too bad, it’s gone. If it contains a Killer, then that’s a good thing, as it’s gone. The next ball Player 1 chooses is to “Win.” This ball gets placed up on a pedestal of balls that will comprise the cash pot to be won by the team of two. I think there’s 5 spots here. Whether the ball is a Killer or a cash amount, it takes the 1st slot of the 5 slot win pot. Now Player 2 repeats. It gets tricky now, and you’ll see why the Killer sux. As before, when Player 2 picks the ball to Bin, they are gutted (an overused Brit term) if it’s a dollar amount and over the moon (another overused term) if its’ a Killer. Easy so far. Ah, but now when they pick the ball to Win, if it’s a Killer, then it takes a 0 off of the accumulated cash total in the pot. So, for example, if they were at 7,000 pounds and pick a Killer, the pot goes to 700 pounds. This continues until all balls are gone. You can see how this gets tense (though still purely random) if at the end you are down to a Killer or a 75,000 pound ball. Let’s say you had 10,000 pounds in the pot when you were in this situation. The last pick could either take you to 85,000 pounds or smack you down to 1,000 pounds!

On to phase 3. The pot is finalized.

This is my favorite phase, to be sure. This phase is called “Split or Steal.” Keep in mind that throughout the entire show the contestants have been trying to build some sort of rapport with each other. Phase 3 gives the real story. In split or steal, each contestant is given two balls. One says, yep, “split”, and the other “steal.” They each choose one and reveal them at the same time to each others’ face. Before the reveal they get a couple of minutes to talk to each other about what their plans are. Here’s the beautiful bit: If both contestants choose split, then they halve the pot and go home pretty happy. If they both choose steal, then they both get zilch. If one does split and the other steal, then the one who chose steal gets it all. Let me tell you, human nature is revealed in all of its’ glory in this game. It is gorgeous seeing some of these guys establish a “trusting” relationship during the game, only to steal everything at the end. In one case there was a woman pensioner (read – retiree) against a young gal. The pensioner clearly needed the money and went on at length about how it would put her life back on track. “I trust you” they always say. Sorry, toots, you walk away with NOTHING and youngster gets like 90K!! On the other hand, occasionally someone will actually do the split/split thing. Think about yourself in that same situation, if you don’t trust the guy you surely don’t want him walking away with the cash, so you really teeter between split and steal.

In watching the game I conclude that people generally suck, though.

My personal quest for gold at the Olympics

2008-08-13T15:28:00.000-07:00

This blog sucks. So go see Lari's if you haven't already: http://larisleftview.blogspot.com

Abby Normal

2008-08-07T03:05:00.001-07:00

Say hello to Abigail Laurel Chi, my fresh out of the wrapper niece*

Sorry Conrad, you cannot repress the Collins gene...

It's weird seeing my little sister growing up...

* Following on to Adrian's blog, we're waiting to see if Abby might not in fact be fresh out of the Rapper.

Impressive

2008-07-31T23:22:00.000-07:00

Miscel"lame"eous

2008-07-30T14:24:00.000-07:00

I was looking through my photo archives (that's fancy language for "I was dicking around on my computer") looking for a silly picture that my brother did (that I can not find) and ran across some truly ridiculous pictures. Some not so ridiculous.

Enjoy.

Lari and I have a series of photos where we've taken our own picture. This is one of the better ones...

I fondled Steve Vai's guitar a few years ago. Lari fondled Steve.

My babies have grown up since these days...

This is what happens when you first get photo editing software and can't resist showing off your "skills"

I'd say it was time for a new helmet. I still use this one.

When you're rolling with the foam filter lid, you're rolling with the best

What it's all about

2008-07-30T00:30:00.000-07:00

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels

2008-07-29T11:00:00.000-07:00

Ever had your new bike stolen? I have.

Remember that nice red bike in the blog? I do too.

Please check E-bay on a regular basis for me.

In order to combat the evil thoughts I have towards the son's a bitches who took my bike in such a professional fashion I have taken to randomly surrounding myself with pleasant images, hence the puffy dude above. He does look a little sad, though, doesn't he? Think Puffy got his new frigging bike nicked? Think Puffy put a lot of time and care into the preparation and setup of his bike prior to it getting stolen? Think Puffy wants to go Karate Kid all over the culprits? You're damn right he does. Wonder what he would use to get his mind off of the situation...

But enough of the bad news.

I'll close with a sample, a *real* sample, of one of the questions we might receive on the theoretical portion of our looming Driving test. And I quote:

"A sheep herder motions for you to stop. You should:"

Mr. Llean

2008-07-15T06:19:00.000-07:00

The cows love Zoe!

Audrey fooled around on a Quad at a local fete. She had a blast. The kid has some skills.

Pleasure Beach amusement park at Blackpool. Seaside parks RULE!

Look closely and you will see Lari and Audrey. I wouldn't touch this ride with a ten foot pole! That kid is something else. She was giggling the whole time. Freak.

This ride was crazy

You can always count on a touch of class from me

On Central Pier in Blackpool

Llangollen, Wales. That's pronounced Clangawclen. What not just spell it Clangawclen, son's a... We stumbled across this place on our way to Chirk castle. It looks and feels very European here. We even had a crepe at the local street fair.

Hi, my name is Pat and I used to post here.

Been a while, I know. I've only got time to post a few pix from our recent happs in Blackpool, etc.

Oh yeah, my little sister just had a baby yesterday! Congrats Hilary, welcome Abigail!

Bits and bobs

2008-06-16T12:06:00.000-07:00

Me and my ex-bike. Cannock Chase Forest

Stowe Landscape Gardens

Last couple weekends in a nutshell, coming from Captain Verbose... I took in some riding at Thetford Forest. 4 1/2 hours of driving for 3 hours of riding in mush. There was a couple miles of dry, but for the most part I was snorkeling. We also hit the Stowe Lansdcape Gardens, another National Trust site. Beautiful piece of land adjoining the Stowe School, a private affair where they appear to be very rich and play a lot of cricket, evidently a sport that requires you to be rich. Or go to the Stowe school.

I finally popped for my new bicycle, by the way. I ended up getting a German brand called Cube. I hadn't ridden a full-suspension bike in a while. After literally riding down the driveway and back (gravel, you see) on this bike I wondered why I ever went away from it. Smooth, baby.

This last weekend we went to Cannock Chase Forest where they have a purpose built mountain bike course as well as loads of outdoor play stuff for the kids. We made a day of it and everyone had a blast. Sunday, for Father's day we chilled and saw the new Indiana Jones movie. I love these movies, and Spielberg, too, but WHAT is with his alien obsession? Great flick except for the ending. How many more movies are we going to ruin with also-ran alien silliness? The movie is already built on a silly tongue-in cheek vibe, let's leave out aliens, shall we?

Freaky Rabbit sculpture at Cannock Chase

Another freaky sculpture at Cannock Chase. And a fish, too.

On a serious note, I am attending a service for a friend of mine tomorrow. You may remember one of my early blogs talking about a guy who speaks fluently in about 10 languages. He was also a musician, funny as hell, and a generally great guy to be around. Herbert passed away a couple weeks ago. He had just gotten back from vacation/work in the States and showed up with some new toys, including a Mac. The Friday before the weekend he died we were laughing our butts off throughout the day, as we should be. Rest in Peace, my friend.

Why there's professional photogs

2008-06-16T10:32:00.001-07:00

Lari was here

Ken DeDycker. The boy is built like a football player and can ride that bike

The British round of the World Motocross Championship has come and gone. What a blast. I love the dirt spray in the picture above - that's Tommy Searle, who went 1-1 last weekend in France, but didn't do quite that well in the UK (his home country) race we attended. Oh well, he's looking good on that KTM and as of last weekend leads the MX2 championship.

I normally wouldn't mention how expensive events like this are, but in this case we had to pay for a babysitter - for the entire day - for two kids. At least the beer, as usual, was only 4 pounds a piece. Yes, $8. The weather was overcast all day, no rain, almost no dust. The crowd was around 21,000 strong. The pits were open to all, which was very cool. They also had a parade of legends with some old school champions riding around in their vintage gear and bikes (I bumped into Chuck Sun, a former bad boy who ironically lives in Colorado.) The racing action was fantastic, and now Lari has been introduced to the Euro racing scene so she's developed some favorites. Oddly, the picking of these favorites seems to relate to how good they look in their gear, or something like that. The day was over before we knew it. 4 pro motos, 2 vet pro motos - all run on time.

As I think I've mentioned before, the Brits seem to really cater to kids, be it in a pub, park, or in this case, the Motocross venue. They had rides for the kids, including a little area for riding Quads, bumper cars, a spin-to-make-you-sick ride, and the whirly thing in the picture below.

Oh yeah, and there was a portable topless joint, brought to you by Spearmint Rhino. Only in Europe. Check out Lari's blog for a few more det's on the experience. One of the highlights was surely the Welsh streaker who ran the entire track.

Shaun Simpson

What you don't want your daughter to be saying at age 3

2008-05-28T14:38:00.001-07:00

"Look at our jugs, Dad!"

Fortunately, she was referring to the new drinking glasses (with handles) we bought them...

2nd in a series of 2

2008-05-28T08:54:00.000-07:00

My Mom's purchase. There's nothing not funny about this shirt.

Good stuff

2008-05-26T08:33:00.000-07:00

York!

The Dalek stayed calm during our road trip

Who needs toys?

As usual, it's been a jam-packed couple of weeks. Work has been nuts and we still try to go with the "work hard, play hard" philosophy - successfully, so far. Let's see, the week following our Wells trip my parents came out so we spent the weekend with them. On Saturday we hung out and had a nice pub meal, at which I noticed the following:

Come on Dad, those look like tentacles, not eyebrow hairs! Get those trimmed before you start a riot.

On Sunday we went to Cambridge. The weather was again beautiful and we took in some punting on the river. This was a popular activity with the weather being so nice, so there was lots of collisions and submersions to be had. Fortunately we were only spectators to this silliness.

Not entirely sure what's up with the look on Auds' face

After touring some more of the College(s), lunch, and some shopping we went home. On Monday my parents left for their week and a half tour around England. Lots to see!

On Friday of this week we dropped the kids off at Paul's house for a sleep-over. The primary motivation for this was that Paul's wife was in a production of Mack & Mabel that we went to go see. Yvette had to change costumes about 10 times! It was a great production and the kids had a great time back at the ranch. Not surprisingly, Paul felt like the odd man out in a house full of kids!

On Sunday, it turned out that there was an airshow at Duxford. The kids were over the top from lack of sleep, so I ended up going by myself. Thanks, Lari! Duxford, even without the airshow bit, is a fantastic museum as part of the Imperial War Museum family. They have a pile of amazing planes, many of which are still flown (as a result, they have to keep oil pans beneath them while they are on display.) I went on a Concorde and saw static displays of many of my favorites: Spitfire, Hurricane, B-17, B-29, P-47, and P-51, among others. WWII planes are gorgeous. That was my dream job - to work on/design them. 'Fraid I missed that calling by a few years. During the show I got to hear those amazing engines as a number of them flew.

History!

The ever-amazing Spitfire

My parents were back in town on the following Friday (the 23rd) and we met them in London. That place RULES!!!!!!!

Happy hour is hopping in London. We did not partake. Something about a 3 and 7 year old being in our party...

Because we hadn't completely worn the kids out, a drive to York on Saturday was in order. York is another amazing city we wanted to return to after having visited it a few years back. York has it all: good pubs, good shopping, quaint streets, a cathedral (York Minster), ghost stories abound, a castle, drunks, you name it!

The girls on The Shambles in York

Today has been chill day. We needed it...

Next weekend Lari and I are going to the British round of the World Motocross Championships! In the words of the drink my brother and I got in the most trouble over as kids:

Covent Garden has it all

2008-05-26T07:53:00.000-07:00

I'll let it speak for itself. Enjoy.

P.S. My Mom bought a gem of a t-shirt as well. I'll post it when I get the pix.

Take this out to the ballgame...

2008-05-08T03:40:00.000-07:00

Outside the Crown in Wells

(The movie "Hot Fuzz" was shot primarily in this city)

Another awesome weekend. Saturday Audrey and I went to get her some bicycle gloves (we failed), then the family went to our friends Paul and Yvette's house to drop Audrey off their daughter Emily's birthday party. After the party we came back for a few laughs then went home to pack for our Sunday, semi-unplanned adventure. Monday was a Bank Holiday here so we had to go do something!

We ended up driving to Avebury, a less well-known sibling to Stonehenge. The size of the rocks wasn't as impressive as the 'Henge, but there were tons of them. The whole area was massive, littered with rocks, with a circular dike surrounding the entire perimeter. After spending an hour dodging sheep shit we drove down to the 'Henge. We've been there 3 or 4 times over the years and we have yet to pay the entrance fee. Don't. It only gets you a little closer to the rocks, which you can no longer touch or get very close to anyway.

Next on to Salisbury where we spent some time looking around the city and the Cathedral.

The Stones at Avebury

You can see the edge of the dike in the foreground

Proud members of the sheep shit producers club

The weather was absolutely gorgeous. Salisbury is a pretty neat town with the old city wall still partially in tact, and the river Avon flowing through it. We settled in for some surprisingly disgusting food later in the day. A real treat! But the beer was cheap. Cheaper, I should say.

The food was bad at the restauraunt in Salisbury, but the entertainment was top notch

Inside the Cathedral in Salisbury

Next, on to Glastonbury to at least look at the Tor (Tower) on the hill, then to show up at the Abbey just as it closed. Hey, we got enough in today, so it's all good. We then drove to Wells. I did some business here a few years ago so Lari and I actually had been to Wells before. Gorgeous city with an amazing Cathedral and generally cool atmosphere.

One of the oldest residential streets in Europe with the Wells Cathedral in the background

Please give the camera back, a-hole

After another high priced crap-can meal and a stroll around the city we turned in. Our hotel had a pretty neat view of the Cathedral. The next morning I went out to feed the parking meter and the guy told me that the street was closed off and I better get my car outta there! (May Day celebration was taking place later that day.) Needless to say we bolted. On to the Chedworth Roman Villa ruins. This place was in the middle of NOWHERE! (I wish the super narrow roads leading to places like this were one-way, because the roads are fun to drive on, but so narrow that you daren't go fast.) The ruins were fascinating. Those guys were WAY ahead of their time in so many ways. Some of the rooms here had a forced-air heating system under the floor. Baths (hot, cold, warm). There still remained some of the mosaic flooring.

Tile floor in the Chedworth Roman Villa ruins

We had to hustle out of there at this point to get home for another(!) birthday party starting at 2:00.

I personally capped off this great weekend by mowing the lawn. I know how to live!

Enjoy.

P.S. As if I needed another reason to hate baseball (sorry baseball fans) I now have another. The U.S. Supercross season has been shown here on a semi-regular basis (unfortunately I only figured this out after round 12 of 16.) It airs at 4:30 in the morning on Thursdays and, yes, is preceeded by frigging baseball. Have you EVER seen a baseball game end "on time"? No, you haven't. Well, guess what gets pre-empted every time? Sons a...

Son of a...

2008-05-01T13:11:00.000-07:00

I came home from work yesterday, glanced on the table and there's a letter there. We rarely get any mail, typically just bills, so I was curious what this was. Hmm, addressed to me but no sender address on the front. I casually flip the thing over to open it and see a stamp on the back that reads "Fratton Police Station Kingston Crescent, North End, Portsmouth PO2 8BU."

Quick mental calculation: I was just in Portsmouth to see the Historic Naval Docks. They have traffic cameras everywhere. Oops.

I think I was shaking as I opened the thing up. I don't yet have a British License (can't get one until you've been here 6 months) and I've already f'd it up. Nice work, chief.

To my great surprise and relief, this was a letter from the Hampshire Constabulary letting me know that while out on patrol April 12, an officer spotted my "Sat Nav holder on display." In other words, my GPS cradle was stuck to the windshield. It goes on, fairly lengthely (?) to talk about how "Opportunist thieves" operate in the area and look for these kinds of these and would I please "accept the letter and advice in the spirit in which it is given."

How cool is that?

You bacco orato comma walba?

2008-04-28T14:02:00.000-07:00

The girls and I went to Salcey Forest this weekend whilst Lari went shopping with Julie, our neighbor. The weather was gorgeous this weekend! Salcey forest has a bike trail, a play area, cafe, and lots of walking trails, including one called "Tree Top Walk" where they've built a walkway that climbs above the trees. Apart from being reminded of the Ewok village in Star Wars, I almost had a panic attack because the people kept bouncing the long-span walkways. The girls had a blast goofing around the playground and running up and down the tree-top walkways.

The start to this day wasn't quite as fun. Our neighbors were kind enough to permanently loan us their old lawn mower. (Some friends!) Of note: It has no wheels. The Brits seem to be in to hovercraft, and this lawn mower is no exception. It's also electric. Is it me, or does that seem a like a fairly bad design idea? (Whirling blade + electric cord with amazing ability to get in your way.) After a couple hours of fiddling about, we are no longer the white trash of the Croft.

On Sunday I went for a bike ride and then met the family at Pitsford reservoir. We are lucky to have such a cool place so close by.

And then we went shopping. Urg. But I got some new CD's, so it's not all bad. Let me put a plug in for Whitesnakes's new album. For anyone yearning for a little taste of slightly older school flavored rock - they nailed it with this one. Good stuff. And Reb Beach of Winger fame on guitar, Oh yeah! Also picked up Young Knives and The Last Shadow Puppets.

Hopefully you saw Lari's blog about our trip to Portsmouth. That experience was a real treat. Seeing the Mary Rose, The Victory, and the Warrior was amazing. We want to go back and spend some more time. 1 day was not enough.

Gorgon

2008-04-28T13:51:00.000-07:00

Right. I just saw a frigging 4 pound spider in the garage. Spiders are ugly enough, but 4 pounders? I wouldn't be surprised if it took off on my bike one of these days. Hey, at least maintain it. You know, a little chain lube, tighten the bolts, etc. And wear a helmet. On second thought, if you die sooner because you aren't wearing one, then feel free to experience the wind whistling through your hair.

This same variety of 4 pounder was in the house a few weeks ago when a buddy of mine was over. Whereas I was treating it like the skittering incarnation of the monster in Alien, he grabbed it and threw it outside. I was in awe. The likelihood of me getting anywhere near a spider like that, let alone TOUCHING it, is equivalent to the likelihood of me gargling battery acid.

Later.

Rocky Mountain Thigh

2008-04-23T14:16:00.000-07:00

Ever seen The Apprentice? We just got done watching an episode of the latest British season.

It's nice to know people are dumb-asses the world 'round. It seems everyone can be categorized into the standardized personality types be it in the USA or England, I can assure you.

But I'm here to officially volunteer my services for a reality show like this or The Amazing Race. Put the worlds most impatient smart-ass on TV and watch those ratings SKYROCKET. Come on, ABC, what are you waiting for?!?!??!?!

Wow, I've hit an "ass" count of two, no three(!) in this post. Sorry, kids.

Someone please buy me a new mountain bike and send it to me. Bill - you'll be interested to note that your tight ass (damn, that's #4) would struggle over here. Bike prices, like most everything else here, are ridiculous. And, as you know, I am genetically programmed to get a new bike roughly once every two years. Wait, I'll just buy one in the U.S. and ship it here! No problem, Mr. Collins, just pay the 15% import duty levied on the purchase price, then pay 17.5% VAT levied on the purchase + shipping price. I don't need to be an Apprentice winner to determine that's what we might call a trade barrier.

So, anyway, send me a bike, please. Someone.

Peace.

P.S. A Happy Birthday shout out to my brother (yesterday!) and my good friend Jenn (today!)

H2 Oh Yeah

2008-04-06T09:25:00.000-07:00

If you want to learn more about the places we've been, check out http://www.nationaltrust.org.uk/

Yesterday we went to Baddesley Clinton (unbelievable Tudor house. My dream home), Kinwarton Dovecote (junk, not worth the stop), Coughton Court (very cool hall with some interesting ties to Roman Catholic England), and The Fleece Inn (an "unspoilt English pub").

Best invention in Europe, possibly in all of the world, ever: Electric water heaters for showers:

No more ploys to get a hot shower before anyone else. Can you say infinite hot water?

Soundcheck Time (the most recent things on my turntable, er, CD, er, iPOD)

Foals, Elbow, Merz, One Night Only, Guillemots, Hot Chip, Mark Ronson

Don't be cilia

2008-04-03T02:44:00.000-07:00

"The" Tree! Yes, that tree

It's true I'm a geek, but I'm sure all of you will appreciate that we went to Isaac Newton's house a couple weeks ago. To say that guy was a genius is a hideous understatement. Anyone who's taken elementary physics studied Newton's laws of motion, etc. "Force = mass x acceleration" seemed to be at the center of everything we studied in engineering school. (It surely affected how fast we could chug.) He invented the refracting telescope and came up with the notion of (and characterized) gravity, among MANY other things. It was awe inspiring being in the guys' pad. The house we visited (Woolsthorpe Manor) was where he was born and grew up. Remember hearing about the apple tree? That tree is at this house. Well, let me clarify: The "son" of the tree, as the guide described it, is here. The original tree blew down a couple hundred years ago and was pruned back by the locals. They left the main trunk section, though, and from that grew the current tree. What a treat it was to stand in the place where he formulated some of his ideas.

As a funny side note to the visit: At the parking lot I kept hearing this odd whining noise. Turns out it was a couple in their rear-wheel-drive Jaguar - stuck. Keep in mind the parking lot was a slimy area of grass and mud. It had been raining earlier in the day, hence the slime. I pushed the guy out and he proceeded to roll down the window and said something about Newton's Law's working against him. Priceless.

I got a British cap. Dig it.

More later. Be good.

Bag from the local Indian food place. Dig it, too.

American Idle

2008-03-30T12:44:00.000-07:00

I'm back. Sorry for the wait.

Where did I leave off? Oh yeah, the MX race. Well, since then we've experienced:

Canons Ashby
Charlecote Park
Lyveden New Bield
An antique show in Lamport Hall
Tattershall Castle
Belton House
Peeling out in the driveway
Woolsthorpe Manor
Wimpole Hall and Home Farm
Cambridge University
The back of Lari's hand

Just to be consistently annoying, I'm going to end this blog now 'cuz I have to run. I'll add more later. Remind me next time to reveal more about ostrich stroganoff, Angband, electric water heaters, Brampton Halt, the size of the spiders around here, and Isaac Newton's House.

This table is over 400 years old. I was fascinated thinking about the people who sat at it over the years and what was happening around them. Slightly more interesting than the stories a 70's dinette set might tell. If a dinette set could talk...

Suds

2008-03-09T10:24:00.000-07:00

Pub on wheels

Cool weekend. We went for a drive on Saturday and did some shopping (the girls have added to their stack of shoes), saw the town of Woodstock, and Oxford University. We would have seen Canons Ashby, a National Trust site, but I forgot the membership card that I had printed off the day before. Nice. At least we saw the outside of it. Oxford University was something else. The buildings were beautiful, very historic-y, and the whole place had a cool vibe to it. We're going to go back when we have a day to burn there. We finished off the day at a family friendly pub restaurant. There's quite a few of these types of places here. The outsides typically look very quaint and crumbly, and the insides are completely re-furbished with clean, utilitarian purpose. This particular place still retained the original low roofs. I had to duck down quite a bit.

Look at the face of this thing, folks

This gives a bit better perspective

So does this
Whip this!

Tommy Searle

Today I went to the first round of the British Motocross Championship. I'm sure most of you reading this haven't been to a National Motocross race in the States, so this will mean more to those who have. The race was at Donington Park, most famous for its' road racing course. The motocross track is in the infield. Unlike Daytona's infield, this one is GIANT. When you first walk into the venue you approach the base of the biggest jump on the track. I was fascinated by it. I took a bunch of pictures that continue the tradition of amateur photos not being able to fully capture the moment. I rate mine towards the top of those that completely miss the mark. There is one American racing, who happens to be the MX2 champion from last years' series (Mike Brown.) Unfortunately, he had some bad luck today. The racing was great in both classes with close battles in both. All-in-all a great experience, although the rest of the family stayed home so that was a bummer. Other notes from the races:

The pits are free, and open the whole day
There are not enough toilets
There were more than enough food vendors
I paid $7 for a hamburger that can best be described as confusing (the hamburger, or perhaps the fact that I bought it)
They had a mobile pub. I was forced, therefore, to have a beer
When it is time for the riders autograph session, they make several announcements on the PA for the team managers to get their riders ready
Despite what seemed like would be a very organized autograph session, many of the riders didn't turn up, including Mike Brown
The PA was unlike anything I had ever heard in the States: I could actually hear it! And from anywhere in the venue!
There are some fast dudes over here!
From European MXGP fame: Gareth Swanepole, Stephen Sword, Pascal Leuret, Billy MacKenzie, Kenneth Gundersen and Tommy Searle were racing
This is the same venue that the MX des Nations is going to be held at this year in September
Did I mention how big that frigging jump was?

Hope everyone is well. Keep the balance.

Enjoy the Seenery

2008-03-04T14:38:00.000-08:00

Alpe D'Huez, France

Not much text today, I just wanted to add some more pix and keep my sparse commentary on a roll. And no, that's not a typo in the entry title. I just coined the term "seenery." Hey, it's stuff I've seen!

Chateau Vizille, France

Did you know?

Mother's Day was on March 2nd here in the UK?
Spiders have toes?
Daylight saving is on March 9th for the U.S. It's on March 30th for Europe. What the hell?
Lari's birthday is March 19th? Flood her blog with some comments, people!
How many of you thought about the spider toe thing? I just made that up.
British music has a similarity to American music: For every good album there's at least 50 bad ones. Some good bands I'm discovering: One More Grain,The Futureheads, Adele, Maps, Editors, Klaxons.

Stamford, UK

My awesome wife and I.

*Photo credit Audrey Collins

Cool building in Stamford. Uh, nice car in the frame. Uh... is it just a pub?

Eyeballing your heirloom

2008-02-27T04:51:00.000-08:00

Anyone read about the earthquake in England? Well, we felt it! It woke both Lari and I up but I was so tired that while Lari was suggesting it might have in fact been an earthquake, I said it was wind, go back to bed honey. Sure enough, it was an earthquake. The girls lost a few limbs but we're all doing well now. I'm still trying to figure out how my wind could have caused things inside the house to rattle.

Zoe in a tree

Well, we're back from a trip to "the continent" - local slang for mainland Europe. Here in the UK they often call the continent "Europe", almost as if they were somehow not part of it. In 6 days we hit 5 countries: Switzerland, France, Germany, Austria and Liechtenstein. It was primarily for work but we did slip in a few hours of play. The girls came with us and had the pleasure of spending a couple days with me while Mom worked. One day we drove to Chateau Vizille (in Vizille, France) and the next we went to Alpe D'Huez, famous for being a regular stop on the Tour de France. I'm sure Lari will be providing a blow-by-blow of the whole adventure on her blog, so I'll leave it at that.

Auds in Alpe D'Huez

England Rugby continue to do well in the Six Nations, barring their initial defeat at the hands of Wales. I bought a jersey. I am now a native.

Anyone heard of a SCART cable? This is the single worst cable style in existence. Think of a stiff garden hose with a planet-sized connector on each end. I mention it because this is one of the common standards here and I had to deal with a rather unwieldy one as I finally picked up a TV and a (region-free!!) DVD/HDD recorder and had to hook them up. If you need to defend yourself against Vikings or something, I suggest a SCART cable. Hooking up DVD to TV - avoid it.

We got our household goods OK. The inside of our house looks like an Apache Junction swap meet staging area. Guess what we're doing this weekend?

This is a private residence!

Anyone actually reading this?

Today's English lesson: complain = winge

This is Auds in the same tree

Dual Sport: Wave of the future!

60 Foot Triple In Your Back Seat

2008-02-14T12:02:00.000-08:00

Our sea container full of stuff comes tomorrow. Lari wasn't kidding - it's bigger than our house. I'm starting to have palpitations about where everything is going to fit. The rental furniture gets moved out at 8:00 and the other guys should be here with our stuff around 9:30. Absolutely fascinating information, isn't it? The point is, we are in a crunch to get things organized. We are also going out of the country Saturday so the heat is on.
Oh yeah, and for packing efficiency the guys disassembled anything that could possibly be disassembled. They disassembled things I didn't know could be disassembled. 'Course, reassembling is a bit trickier, isn't it...
I didn't say much about our London trip. It was awesome, full stop. I love that place. We drove to the Northampton train station then took the rail to Euston Station. The girls were pretty focused on how cool the trains were and when Enchanted/Wicked would start, but they seemed to enjoy themselves. Audrey and I, alright, I, enjoyed a beer in a pub called the Iron Duke that literally overlooked the Apollo Victoria theatre where Wicked was playing. The weather was utterly perfect. Sunny, no clouds, nice temp. 10/10. We walked around quite a bit and Lari went through Chinatown before we met up after taking the girls to their shows.
I'm starting to dig Rugby. They are in the middle of a competition called Six Nations Rugby. England, Ireland, Wales, Scotland, Italy and France all face off in a series of games. I've quickly been recruited to the England flock, of course. These are some real frigging men that play this game. Legs like tree trunks, built like tanks, no pads, nice rears per newly converted fan Lari Collins. Weird how she got interested in this game so rapidly. There's a local Rugby team called the Northampton Saints. We'll probably try to catch a local game or two.
I have to go, so I'll close with a few more American to English translations that we're picking up on: Trash Dumpster = Skip, Playing Field (i.e. football field) = Pitch, Raisins = Sultanas, and my new favorite: Really Happy = Chuffed.

'Preciate the call!

Don't tangle your jangle

2008-02-11T07:47:00.000-08:00

LONDON CALLING

I'll post some more comments later, but here's a few pix from the weekend:

We figured Wicked would be a little much for Zoe, so Lari had the

pleasure of taking Zoe to see Enchanted...again

Buy low, sell high.

Reheated Recursion

2008-02-05T02:58:00.001-08:00

Paraphrased, not entirely verbatim, but generally accurate Quote of the Week:

"I never realized how important being in a retail

environment is to my mental health."

-Lari Collins

Wedding Tackle

2008-02-05T01:46:00.001-08:00

I lifted the picture above from the BBC website. Don't tell. These are my good friends from Master Chef. I'm starting to develop feelings for them.

What the blazes happened last weekend? Hello Patriots and England Rugby? I guess that's why sports are so fascinating. Humans are involved and (most) humans have emotions which throws an element of randomness in. Imagine the pressure of your perfect season being down to the last game. I can only liken it to the pressure I feel when forced to choose what restaurant to eat at, which surely leads to divorces in many American households, so I'm guessing it's pretty intense.

Let's see, what's been happening here in the UK? I finally got a car. This is a fairly gorey story in terms of the semantics surrounding getting insurance, paying for the car, etc., but I'll spare you. I will say that while car salesmen are the same across the globe, the process of buying a car is much easier in the UK than in America. In any case, it's no wonder I haven't bought a car at a dealer since 2000.

We didn't do anything too exciting last weekend. A bit of down-time. By default we end up seeing amazing things, though, just because we are so close to them. On the way back from Lari's National Insurance Number interview, for example, we drove around Castle Ashby. On the way home from shopping we slipped by Holdenby House:

Speaking of driving, one of the unique aspects of driving here is that they rely heavily on a massive network of traffic cameras scattered around the country. Some measure your speed and compare it to the limit, others take your average speed over a distance and compare it to the allowable. The good news is, if a little ironic, that they tell you where these cameras are. They give you plenty of advanced warning, even! The warning signs typically display an icon of the camera a la:

My favorite has to be the one that shows the camera and says "Think!" below it. I love these Brits.

We went to our neighbors house for dinner Sunday night. We are so lucky, having had great neighbors back in Colorado, and now we have awesome neighbors here. They have two kids (3 1/2 and 5) and more importantly for Audrey, two cats. She is loving it! Their daughter (3 1/2) loves to dress up in Princess costumes and is equally, if not more sassy than Zoe. Didn't think that was possible. While there, I had a tasty beer that they told me was won at a raffle. The funny part is that this raffle was held at the kids primary school! Yes, they held a raffle for alcohol at what amounts to an American elementary school. They are holding a disco this Friday night at the school and will have a full service bar there. I love these Brits.

One more cool thing - while watching the Rugby match this weekend it hit me that the RBS (Royal Bank Of Scotland) logos on the field looked "normal" relative to the camera, almost as if they were superimposed onto the video feed. Keep in mind the camera is WAAAAY up in the stands somewhere. These clever blokes literally, by design, spray the logos on the field all stretched out so that they look normal on the TV. Clever, I thought.

Well, this weekend we are going to London for Audrey's 7th birthday. We are going to try and get into Wicked. She has the soundtrack memorized, word for word, and can't wait to see it. In a couple weeks we are going on a business/holiday trip (with the family) to France, Switzerland and Germany. This is a far cry from my business trips to Irvine. We are lucky indeed.

Enjoy.

Overdubbed Innuendo

2008-01-28T05:27:00.000-08:00

My current view:

What a weekend. Friday I took the day off and went for a mountain bike ride in the morning. It's not every day you ride through golf courses, bridleways, past stately mansions, pubs, 600 year old villages and through pedestrian friendly train track crossings to get to some single-track. You golfers would be jealous of the course I rode through!

We spent the remainder of the day getting our weekly shopping out of the way. It was a zoo, but we got most of it done. One of the things we bought was a portable clothes organizer. No closets here, ya know. Speaking of shopping, some funny things about shopping carts: To get one you have to unlock it with a pound coin. If you return it you get the coin back. Much like the airport luggage carts in the States. Now, about the design of the thing... Hang with me on this - In the States, the set of wheels closest to the the push handle is fixed so that the wheels rotate, but stay in a straight line, i.e. forward, yeah? The set of wheels furthest from the push handle is not fixed, so that the wheels can rotate, and when you turn the cart, they will also swivel around to facilitate such a move. Well, for some reason I will never understand, both sets of wheels on UK carts rotate and swivel. This is ugly, folks. The frigging carts get a mind of their own without that small but until now unappreciated innovation, the non-swiveling-wheel-near-the-push-handle. It's the little things in life. Much like pillows, I hope you appreciate your shopping carts.

On to Saturday. We set out for a day drive to see a few odds and ends. A full day it was. We first saw Fotheringay Church and castle. See the pic:

Gorgeous! The town it was in was very cool. Next we saw Castle Rising:

There's a mound built round the entire castle that you can't see in these pix. The girls loved running around it. Next we drove past the Sandringham Estate. We were in a bit of a hurry so we didn't see much. (Look it up on the web...)

Now on to the Hunstanton coast. Not all too famous, but it has a cool cliff-line:

Yes, that light house is for sale.

And finally, on to Holkham Hall. This silly thing was closed, but were were able to walk the grounds. The Earl of Leicester lives here. According to the literature he is re-doing some of the living areas. Are they not posh enough? This pad was unbelievable. Again, look it up on the web to get some better pix.

By now, and especially after putting in about 4 miles of walking throughout the day, everyone was whipped. We headed back home. Lo and behold, what did we find near Wells-next-the-sea?

(In case you can't read it, it says Real Ale Shop.) Perfect.

Fistful of Squalor

2008-01-24T07:29:00.000-08:00

Don't forget to visit my brother's blog. He's going to make a difference.

http://www.gern-blanston.blogspot.com/

Random Notes from Bri'ain

2008-01-24T04:23:00.001-08:00

You have to separate your trash. There's a big gray bin for general non-recyclable stuff, a big brown one for hedge trimmings and the like, a small red box for cans/bottles, and a blue one for paper and such
Parking spaces are smaller here than in the US
The main doors in our house use what we would call a skeleton key. There is no rotator knob on the inside of the doors - you have to use the key to lock the door, inside or out. This is a PITA, by the way.
It's true, people hate dentists here even more than we do.
They show boobs on TV. And they cuss. What's not to like about that?
We've been here almost three weeks and still do not have Internet at the house. Lari is going insane.
Yorkshire pudding has no pudding in it! It looks like a little bread cup.
In general people seem to be much less paranoid here. I happened to be at the central bus station one morning when the kids were going to school. There were dozens of kids anywhere from 9 to 16 or so milling about, unaccompanied by adults. People at work confirm that they would have no issue sending their kids by bus to town at 11-ish years old.
Most everything I write is in bullet form. Ask anyone that's received an e-mail from me. It's a sickness at this point.
Zoe's command of English is ridiculous. Her latest thing is to add on "I suppose" to most everything she says.
Audrey's command of most everything is ridiculous.
A few more British word translations: trash can = bin, bathroom = loo/toilet, freeway = motorway, major divided freeway = dual carriageway, chips = crisps (Take a minute to say "crisps." No wonder we don't use this!), fries = chips, sour cream = creme fraiche, windshield = windscreen, trunk = boot, hood = bonnet.
Did I mention the TV tax? To watch "Freeview", i.e. TV you'd pick up with just a simple antenna, you have to pay 135 pounds per year. This offsets the need for commercials. And I'll give them that, on BBC there are little to no commercials during a program. Well worth the money.

Christmas in Brixworth

2008-01-23T03:49:00.000-08:00

WE GOT OUR STUFF! We were pleasantly surprised - no breakage, and Lari tucked in a few things that she had forgotten about. Always nice to have a little surprise. Lari set the girls' rooms up with all of their stuffed animals, books, bedding, etc. so it would all be ready when they got home from school. Their reaction was hilarious! They were running around screaming and jumping and dancing and generally freaking out. I put my bike back together and went down to the local bike shop (surprisingly very well stocked - it serves touristy Pitsford reservoir within a mile of our place) to get some fenders fitted. Never thought I'd do that but much better than a mudspray suit. And you get less weird looks. I rode around the reservoir and went back home to spend some quality time with our worldy goods. And Lari, too.
Idea: Take your kids' stuff away from them between October 1st and December 24th. Give it all back on the 25th. You will now have the best and cheapest Christmas ever. Patent Pending.
FYI: I am listening to one of the guys in the office speak Dutch right now. Oh yeah, this same guy also speaks a Caribbean Dutch dialect, Spanish, French, German, English, and Italian fluently. He is a freak of nature. I am in awe. I suck.
A few of you have asked about the pubs within walking distance of our house. We have not been going to them simply because they are BLOODY EXPENSIVE! Plus, we have the kids so popping down there for a drink is a bit prohibitive. As for the pubs themselves, there are three of them and they are all very old buildings with lots of character. When possible, we do stop in for a beer and count the teeth of the older regulars in there. It doesn't take long.
I never watched cooking shows in the US, but because of the lack of choices here (until we get satellite) Lari and I have become hooked on Master Chef. I don't know what it comes closest to in the States, but basically they pit 6 people against each other to cook some dishes in studio and do a stint in a high-pressure restaurant situation. My favorite bit: I am absolutely fascinated when the judges taste the food. One holds the fork in his mouth for about a full second then quickly removes it. Beautiful.

Mega Malls, Castles and Codebreakers

2008-01-22T00:01:00.000-08:00

We're getting our air shipment today!!! This is big, folks. Zoe's Princess blanket is in this shipment and Audrey's Tekno Pony is as well. You don't really appreciate what you own until you can't get at it for a while. Like your pillow, for example. I hope you all appreciate your pillows. After using a thick 2X6 as one for the last couple weeks I know do.
As my last post showed, we went to Warwick castle. It is known as one of, if not the, best preserved medieval castle in the UK and is a mere 30 miles from where we live. Zoe was terrified of the dungeon but seems to hold that as her "fondest" memory of the place. Audrey liked the exhibits they had sprinkled around the inside of the castle. Both of them loved tromping up the narrow, circular staircases in the towers, but the favorite had to be the rubber dragons they got from the gift shop. After Warwick we drove through Stratford-upon-Avon, ex-home of William Shakespeare. Beautiful town that we need to go back and spend some more time in.
Last weekend we braved the locally notorious Milton Keynes. Wow. This place dwarfs any shopping complex I've ever been to. It's basically a vast gridwork of modern malls and shops. And I mean vast. Most of the buildings are glass and steel structures that, along with the very non-characteristic-of-England grid layout of the streets, give the place an ultra modern feel. The good news is that I was able to slip away for a couple hours and go to Bletchley Park whilst the girls attempted to shop in the packed-stadium-like atmosphere. Bletchley Park is typical of what is an interesting aspect of Europe in general - the contrast of old and new. Tucked right in the middle of a Milton Keynes suburb, Bletchley, yet surrounded by all this ultra modern shopping and structures, is quaint and historically significant Bletchley Park. The Park consists of a manor house and a pile of buildings all situated on what had previously been 500+ acres, but is now about half of that. It is famous primarily for housing the brain trust that worked on breaking the German Enigma codes during World War II. There were tons of exhibits, including reproductions of the machines that were developed to crack the codes. They had to be reproduced because all of the original machines were ordered destroyed at the conclusion of the war. The whole operation was incredibly secretive, obviously, and this was a precaution to protect the technology from falling into the wrong hands. One of the things that struck me was how antiquated the state-of-the-art seems now. No PC's in hut 8 of Bletchley Park. Most of the calculations were done by electro-mechanical means. I learned a lot. I'm glad we have PC's.
After this I went back to the shopping area. Never again will we go there on a Saturday. If Lari gets rattled during a shopping outing, you know it's bad.
And now, I'm going to bite on my nails until the shipment gets here. Please, guitars, be in one piece. Please, Princess blanket and Tekno Pony, be there.

Auds and Zoe

2008-01-21T05:58:00.000-08:00

The girls need some air time...

Here we have the girls' first castle (Warwick) and Zoe's first day of pre-school, Aud's 6th day of Second Year!

Why am I doing this?

2008-01-21T04:55:00.001-08:00

Good question. Answer: We moved to England (Northampton, cultural hub of Europe) and a few of you might want to know what we're going through. Especially those of you that can't even imagine leaving your state, let alone the country. You know who you are. For the most part I am going to capture stream of conciousness thoughts, because that's just how I operate.

I'm still getting used to some of the linguistic differences here. As an example, they refer to companies, bands, etc. in the plural. I.e.:

Krispy Kreme sell good donuts.
Sony are producing surround sound couches.
Interpol are the best band out at the moment.

It almost feels normal driving on the left side of the road now. Fair warning: Stay well clear of me when I visit the States.

More later...

FYI, that's Kyle Summers styling in the picture above, representin' Colorado Springs motocross. 3rd in the WORCS this weekend, baby!